Small Steps Add Up to Big Changes
By Laura Hope
Have you ever decided to make a change, planned what you needed to do, then it just didn't happen? Over and over again? Then you wondered what went wrong, or even worse, beat yourself up for not following through?
I've found that when someone doesn't make a planned change it tends to be because of one (or more) of 3 reasons:
1. You planned too big of a change
2. There's something else in the way that needs to be addressed first
3. The change isn't important to you (meaning it's important to someone else)
Today, let's take a look at the first reason: You planned too big of a change. When we think of something we want to change, we often have this dreamy fantasy of what our life will look like when it's done. We want to get in great shape, or have a successful business, or create Pintrest-worthy organization in our home. And we think big goals need big changes, so we never get around to starting at all, or we start off with such a bang that we quickly fizzle out (a false-start). I love big goals, but I also love balance and respecting my finite energy or other resources. So how do we do things differently?
Let's say you want to start walking a mile every day. And every day you tell yourself you're going to do it, but you just never seem to get started. (Or maybe you really push yourself to just do it, but after a couple of days you let it drop and you're back to your starting point.) Why does this happen? Because going from your current couch-potato state to an avid walker is too big of a step. It's overwhelming, and we don't like overwhelming.
So how can we make it less overwhelming? Start small. Like really, really, really small. Start with a goal that's so small that it's hard not to achieve. Using the same example of having a long-term goal to walk a mile a day, you might start with setting a smaller goal to put your shoes on and walk outside. That's it. Remember, we're going for hard to not achieve. If you even "secretly" expect yourself to do more, you might sabotage this plan.
So for a few days you just put your shoes on and walk outside, turn around, go back inside, and check it off your list and consider it a wild success. In the early stages of change, it's not about how big the step is, it's about being able to say you did it. So for this part, really focus on how to make it fail-proof rather than what you want the final outcome to look like.
Once getting your shoes on and walking outside feels easy-peasy, take it up a notch, while still focusing on achievable. Maybe this means walking to the end of your driveway or your mailbox (even if you already got the mail that day), then stick with this goal for a few days, or however long it takes until you're ready to do more. Then maybe you walk as far as the next building over or your neighbor's driveway, and you stick with that goal for a while until you're ready to do more. Eventually you can work up to a quarter mile, then a half mile, then full mile.
Some people may think that it's silly or pointless to start that small. After all, what good is walking outside just to turn around and walk back in?? Isn't that a waste of time? Maybe it is if you're one of those people who are great at following through. (Anyone?) But if trying to start too big means you never start at all (or you have a ton of false-starts), taking your time with baby steps will get you there much faster.
